Intro and Background to the Journey

Dear friends and family, Greetings from the Kingdom of Cambodia! I've called this place my temporary "home" for the last 2 weeks, but should actually be back in the United States right now. I missed my plane that departed on Friday night, purposefully because there is a greater plan at work. I apologize ahead of time because this will be long, but PLEASE continue reading because I have much to share with you.

As many of you know, I co-lead a trip of 14 students from my school, Southeastern University to Cambodia for two weeks. Our mission was to teach English in a school run by missionaries and love on 75 children in an orphanage there. I would come home May 22, and leave four days later to work with Camp Winshape for the summer. My summer was planned, financially, emotionally and physically..or so I thought. I thought this was all part of God's great plan for my life... While here in Cambodia, I began to feel the Lord telling me my time here is not yet finished. I agreed, but knew that I would have to go home because of my "plans" but would definitely come back to Cambodia whether through another mission trip or as a long term missionary.

One of my friends on the trip is staying here in Cambodia with her sister to complete her internship for her major. We both have the same major and she is a year ahead of me so naturally I would do my internship next summer. We'd joke around a few times about me changing my ticket and staying alongside her, but I never thought about it seriously. Then..some dynamics regarding my internship began to change. The missionaries we are working with who run the school and orphanage are leaving on furlough for 1 year starting next June..right in the middle of when I had hoped to do my internship with them. So I began to realize summer 2011 is out of the question, and so is the following summer in 2012 because they will not be back yet from the states. Either I find a new place to do an internship, or stay..now.

There are many reaons why I have wanted to do my internship here. For one, I've developed relationships with the missionaries, the teachers and children in the school. I would have to teach 300 hours of English, and I could do that in the school since they teach in both Khmer and English. Also, I love Cambodia. I love the country, the people, the children..everything about it. The one thing keeping me from actually making the decision to do it here is selfisly, the heat. It's very hot here. The worst heat I have ever felt in my life, and air conditioning is not easily found.

Halfway through my trip, I heard the Lord whisper to me again that my time here is not finished. Thougths of me staying began to churn around in my mind, yet I never mentioned them to anyone. Then one evening, Kelly (the missionary) asked to talk to me and what I had been thinking about. I hadn't mentioned anything to him yet, but I knew he knew what I was thinking about. I began to pray about whether or not I should stay. I had many reasons to come home including a great summer job waiting, family and friends anxious to see me. I e-mailed back and forth to my advisors at school and they would not allow me to use this summer as my internship because I was lacking one class. So, even if I stayed here using this time as my internship it wouldn't count and I would still have to do another internship. It seemed like a door being shut, but I didn't feel peace about their decision. I felt even more energized about staying andwas ready and willing to fight it. If I wanted to do my internship in Cambodia, it would have to be now as there is no other time I can. I would have to worry about getting credit for it later.

One day as I was journaling the Lord revealed this to me: "Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold, I am doing a new thing, now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert." --Isaiah 43: 18-19 A new thing. Staying in Cambodia sure would be a new thing. Rivers and deserts.. those sounded like advisors saying no to this internship. I still prayed, journaled and asked for guidance from my parents and close friends. They were all in support of whatever I felt the Lord leading me to do. And then I had to make the decision. It didn't matter about my internship anymore. This was about what God wanted me to do. And I did not want to say no to God.. So I decided to stay. Here.
In Cambodia.
My team was overjoyed.
The kids at the orphanage were ecstatic.
Kelly had already bought a bed for me beliving in faith I would stay.
I told one of my friends at the orphanage and she already knew. She told me God had already told her.

Though I decided to stay, I was still in disbelief. To me, it is crazy that I would even consider staying much less decide to. I raised $2100 to come here for two weeks, and in order to stay another two months, I would need to raise at least another $1000. I decided that there would be no denying what God is calling me to do and that I needed to step out in faith and believe Him for what He has laid on my heart.

Here's where it got even crazier... The day I would have left to go home, the missionaries told me there was a complication with my airline ticket. Bottom line, if I didn't get on the plane that night with the team, I would be counted as a "no show" and loose my ticket. What's worse is a one way ticket back to the USA would be $975. I was shocked. Floored. In utter disbelief. Upset..that's an understatement. I cried out to God for over 2 hours asking what He wanted of me. I was trying to do what He had asked me to do by staying. I had already contacted the camp and told them I wasn't coming, and now it seemed a huge door was slamming in my face. I didn't want to doubt God, but raising $2000 became so overwhelming.

As I was praying, I flipped open my Bible randomly to Isaiah 52. Since I wasn't hearing God's voice, I figured reading may yield some kind of answer. As I read the chapter, I came to verse 12 which says,
"For you will not go out in haste or in flight, for the Lord shall go before you, and the God of Israel will be your rear guard."
Everything inside of me stopped. Was this an answer from God? I'd never read this verse before. How often does the Bible talk about flight? I was trying to make the decision of whether or not I should get on this flight to go home. This could not be a coincidence..

Again the Lord spoke to me as I continued reading through Isaiah, "If you pour yourself out for the hungry and satisfy the desire of the afflicted, then shall your light rise in the darkness and your gloom be as the noonday. And the Lord will guide you continually and satisfy your desire in scorched places and make your bones strong; and you shall be like a watered garden, like a spring of water, whose waters do not fail." --Isaiah 58: 10-11.

I can't think of anything else that better describes Cambodia than "sun scorched land." (NIV translation) And that was the verse I had put on my support letters.

Yet..I was still afraid. I wavered back and forth and finally came to the conclusion that if the travel agent did not call back with the news my ticket could be transfered, I would indeed go home with the group that night. As I sat praying and reading my Bible, I'd pretty much convinced myself that it would not work out and I would be going home. Yet I kept telling God that if He wanted me to stay, He would have to make it clear NOW by letting my stay. But if He wanted me to go home, I would indeed get on that plane.

Fifteen minutes before we needed to leave for the airport, the travel agent called and said she was able to transfer my ticket and I would come home on July 12th. Better yet, the transfer fee would only be $200 as opposed to $400 or $500 which they had originally quoted. I was staying. I WAS STAYING. We took my team to the airport and watching them leave was so hard. In my mind, I kept feeling like I should be on that plane with them. Even though I knew I should stay, I was still confused and afraid.

In the last two days, I have sought the face of the Lord and finally found the peace I so desperately needed to stay here. If I could just trust in the Lord and not doubt him, a lot of the emotional stress could have been avoided. I'm still in awe of the verse he showed me in Isaiah 52, and yet I still doubted Him.

So.. here's the conclusion to this very long, detailed letter. =) I am staying here in Cambodia until July 12th. I will be teaching English in the school, working alongside the teachers and also tutoring in the orphanage in the evenings. I'm staying with my friend Amanda and her sister Emily and the three of us will be living at the orphanage. Let me mention, there's no air conditioning...I really will need to trust God for that one! In order to stay I need to raise about $1000 more to cover living, traveling, food and insurace expenses. I didn't expect this to happen, but I have no doubt that what the Lord has began, He will continue to see through and that He will allow every penny to come in. I need you to prayerfully and financially see me through this trip.

If you are able to help me stay, please e-mail me at svmanubens@mac.com Or talk with my parents, Claudio and Nancy (407) 376-5776 and they can give you details on how to help.

I know most of my friends are poor college students just like myself, and I totally understand that feeling! Please pray for me..that I would raise the needed funds and I would continue to trust in the Lord's plan for my life.

When I left the states two weeks ago, I had no idea what would happen here. The Lord is doing many great things in my life and I cannot wait to see what else happens. What I do know is that there are students in need of learning English and orphans to be loved. There is a God more wonderful and amazing than we could ever imagine who orchestrates all of these plans for his purpose and to bring glory to his name. It's not about what we can do, but what God can do through us. Surrendering our lives, our plans, everything to Him..that's what we are supposed to do if we want to be Christ followers. Thank you for reading to the end.. =) I love you all and am so greatful for your presence in my life. Please pray for me..and help me stay. Love, Sera Manubens
svmanubens@mac.com